Dead Diamonds by Daniel Rosenthal

Ok, so I’m in a band.
You might be in a band or know someone who is.
Most likely you know at least me, Nate, Erika, or Josh, and hey, if we haven’t met we probably should. What is better than making friends? The band is a great conversation starter. Maybe it would go like this:

YOU: “Hey, who are you?”
ME: “I’m the drummer (wink).”
YOU: “Let’s hang out.”
ME: “Hell yeah.”
(We talk into the distance)



If you know me (which we already decided you may or may not) you would know that I latch on to new ideas like Nate to any man he sees (it's a gay joke... get it?).
Maybe the most fun I have with the band is when we are in the van talking about what makes the world go 'round. We’re always discussing why friends/companies/relatives/politicians do the things they do. We come up with all these theories that should really be written down here instead of me telling you that we have them. One of the topics we tend to discuss is the meaning of life, and thereby the meaning of its opposite.

Are we friends yet? Sweet. Now that we are friends, I want to talk to you about death.
Apparently there is nothing to stop this disease called life, which is killing all of us. Not like we should stop death.
What if we could decide who lives and who dies? Who would make the call? I suggest looking past this whole life thing and start thinking about what we are going to do after it's all over.
You really only have a couple of options. Be put in a hole, kept in a vase or turned into something from a horror movie.

There's got to be a better way! Wait. I have it.

Get yourself... DIAMONDIZED. i.e. pressurize your remains for a few million years in order to turn yourself in to a shiny, indestructible rock!
I know what you are thinking, gentlemen, "women never paid me any heed in life... but now... the possibilities are endless."
But, yes, maybe you’ll be dropped down the sink when the someone who survived you is washing the dishes. On the other hand, you always loved water parks, right?
I guess what I am really trying to say is there are lots of options when this life comes to a close. Don’t wait until you're dead to make decisions about it, because you can’t, you'll be dead.
Oh, and now that we’re friends I want you to know that I want be made into a diamond. I’m pretty sure at least. I really get hooked on new things I hear about. Oh, oh, will you wear me when I’m dead?

My Mind is Made Up (or Swords for Everyone!)

Many things can be said to contain the attribute awesome. The laptop, the race car, the iPod, and we all have our own personal and cultural ideas of that which is awesome. But certainly, there is one thing that can be held above all others as the pinnacle of awesome-osity: the sword.

That's right, the almighty sword. Whether it be a Gladius, Two-Handed or Katana, swords are a sign of power and might throughout the world... and they're just plain awesome. Seriously. And if you have any doubts, watch Reclaiming the Blade [link], narrated by John Rhys-Davies, one of the few men who's voice-over work could escalate a documentary about something so awesome as the sword to a level of awesome-itude that could prove to be lethal to all within ear-shot.

Don't believe me? Watch this. (If the involvement of JRD isn't enough to slake your awesome-lust, Bob Anderson is also in the film. Who is Bob Anderson? He's Darth freaking Vader.)

After watching this documentary, I was so over-taken with the sheer awesomeness that is the sword, I found my very soul screaming forward from a newly awakened need, a powerful and ancient urge no doubt inherited from my ancestors. A gene hidden deep in my being, awaiting a primal trigger so that it's purpose may be fulfilled. What I'm saying is, I need a sword. A real one. I'll play with it and feed it and take it for walks, honest. I'll name it something awesome, like Thurl Ravenscroft [link] and I'll put it to sleep every night. I swear. I just want a high-carbon steel, heat-tempered, full-tanged beauty of my very own.

So, I'm off to do a little light shopping. Tally ho, ya'll.

Keep it low and in row,

-Nate Bellon(bass)

I Have a man-crush on Michael J. Fox

I was just watching an episode of that show Spin City (they stopped making new episodes in 2004) and was motivated to share. I love Michael J Fox. One time, I was at a Cubs game and he was the special guest during the 7th inning stretch. That was awesome.

Which got me researching and thinking...



Can you, even for a moment, imagine a world where the opening titles of "Family Ties" are ending and the last cast member name comes up as:

Michael Fox

No. You can't. It's impossible, and that's a fact. The reason is because the soon to be 49-year-old actor of "Back to the Future" fame derives his worldly power, wealth and charming good looks not from his starring roles in such Hollywood gems as "Teen Wolf" and "The American President". It has nothing to do with his prolific voice-over career ("Homeward Bound" anyone? "Stuart Little" perhaps?). It does, however, have everything to do with the eternal and mystical power of the letter J. At least that's what it said on Wikipedia. Weird.

Anyways, here's to you J. Fox. You're the man. Keep on rocking and don't let that Parkinsons get you don't.

Josh

PS A much belated fuck you to Rush Limbaugh.