Cut-Resistant Slip-ons: A Missed Market? (or Bloody Feet Aren't Fun Feet)

The Empty Pockets like to play to a dancing crowd. There's nothing better than a bunch of people boogieing down, cutting loose on the dance floor and really workin' it hard to some crunchy jams. Folks like to dance in all sorts of ways, and the ladies of the crowd often find that the dressier of the shoe choices lead to aching feet during a dance-marathon, so they (wisely) choose to remove them. This is when disaster can strike.

Dance floors get packed with people and people bring on dust and debris, but that's all fairly harmless on the feet. What can get you barefooted boogie-bots is broken glass, the enemy of barefoot enthusiasts everywhere.  It happens by sheer accident: A crowded dance floor gets cleared when someone drops their drink, causing a ripple of people moving away from the shattered glass and slippery liquids until it can (hopefully) be fully cleaned of any dangerous particles.

The enemy of bare feet and good times

This very thing happened this past weekend at the wedding of Dennis and Lindsey in Cincinnati. Everybody was getting their groove on and a glass got shattered on the dance floor, causing a small ruckus and a slight boogie interruptus for the dancers. The highly competent staff at the Western Hills Country Club managed to get the dance floor cleaned up and safe for everyone's continued enjoyment, which they did with GUSTO, I might add.

But all of this got me thinking: What if there was some sort of solution that could allow barefoot boogieing to continue unabated and unconcerned with dangerous particulates?

What about something like a Kevlar(tm) or similar half-sock. You know, kind of like the sock they give you at the department stores to try on shoes with? Can these be made of some sort of cut-resistant material? Every sock that's commercially available which is made of some sort of cut-resistant material is marketed towards the seriously tough jobs, rugged outdoorsman, or hockey players of the world. They are thusly built with aesthetics as an after-thought, and rightly so. But what about a dainty, unobtrusive-yet-stylish sock made of cut-proof material for all the barefoot dancers of the world? 

I can't think of anything better than something that would improve the crowd's enjoyment of dancing barefoot with the knowledge of the safety of their tootsies. Imagine the reckless abandon that would be shown on dance floors worldwide. Now all we need is something to stop people like me from stepping on the toes of our dancing partners. (Aha, I think those are called dancing lessons. D'oh!)

Mayhaps we should get someone to sew up a prototype and start an Empty Pockets brand cut-proof slip-on. What would we call them? "Safe Slips"? "Boogie Bottoms"? "Pocket Protectors"?

Bringing 'Safety Dance' a new meaning,
-Nate Bellon(bass)